You can most definitely achieve those goals. As hard as it may be, don't regret the events that led you to right now. Because they produced the thought you now possess that is at the very least the one thing you probably like about yourself right now and see tremendous potential in (as you should!) which is the desire you have to change your relationship with weed. I'm sure your time in college or in "college" whatever you want to call it was stressful as hell. I've been there, seriously. I transferred to three different universities and hid addictions to all kinds of things from my family. That family guilt can be crazy. I was moving around trying to escape things I guess. But hey, you and me, we all had our reasons to do what we did and we have to own them instead of demonizing them. You can't regret those times because they were what your soul needed at the time - and when I say soul I just mean the essence of your being. Even if you didn't have the grandest reason to explain it all, like you got high to escape some terrible memory, it's just as valid that you got high because at the time you wanted to. You did what you wanted to do to feel good, or to feel better or enjoy life. Don't fault yourself for that. Maybe you just needed to check out, even if only for the very reason that one day you'll realize that you're ready to check in for the rest of your life. Obviously those highs didn't accumulate to something you now have, because highs disappear, but you now have perspective. Sure maybe you defied what family or others that you should be doing at the time, but there's no rules to this life.

There's no one single answer to what you do now because it'll be a personal decision. It's funny, I've changed my perspective so many times on weed. First I loved it, then came to believe that it was a total detriment and wanted to be done with it. Then quit, at which point I came to think about my life and realize that cannabis was a beautiful plant that helped me at times, so I decided I wanted to do the 'petioles' thing and have it once in a while. And who knows, maybe that was pure truth speaking or the addict in me speaking because I wanted to do it again, who knows. Then when I went back hard to it, I had a mixed feeling of "oh wow I'm addicted to this and it's a detriment" and at the same time recognizing what it did for me and appreciating it, but still tried to convince myself that I hated it just so I could stop again. As you can see, so messy mentally. All a process though. That was just my process to get to where I ultimately want to go and I'm still working at it. I only mention it because your last sentence strikes me as where the conflict and hard work will lie. Because if you want to enjoy it occasionally, how occasional? And what will you want the next day after that occasional use? It's stressful working those things out. Don't mean to stress you out further, because it might be easy or it might be hard, just saying it's a process. People on this subreddit are more on the side of wanting to quit obviously - after all this is r/leaves. And that's a positive thing because I know I want to be done forever and I'm glad there's this large community of people who do too. You can check out r/petioles, but in my case I'm definitely sticking with /leaves. At least I think so! Lol. Good luck though