One of the features of adhd is being unable/ less able to choose long term gratification over short term gratification. So only thinking about the now. I feel so shit about it, I wish I could do it, but I can’t get enough motivation in my system to do something so boring. Doing rewarding things gives you dopamine, and people with adhd have a chronic lack of dopamine- so it’s really hard to get ourselves to do things that give less dopamine than our current activity. Sitting around gives more dopamine than cleaning up my stuff, for example. So yeah. It feels like the “go” button is malfunctioning. I’m stressing internally and pressing go again and again, but I’m still not going. On the outside I’m sitting on the couch doing nothing and eating chips. So yeah. It looks exactly like laziness. I know I’m not inherently lazy because when I get meds that fill in my dopamine gap I get busy and do all the boring cleaning and exercise and studying…