The beta male position

I think you started to touch on a really good point but didn't quite bring it home. Specifically the misguided idea that physical attributes (big dick, 6 pack, etc...) are the most important factors in attracting women. They're generally not. Check out that OkCupid article where women rated the vast majority of men as having less than average physical attractiveness. Confidence and successfulness are really the pillars of male attractiveness. Sure, some guys are so good looking they can do just about anything. But, as you can see from that article, there aren't a whole lot of them. Most of us are in the 80% (read: physically ugly). But hey, good news, being ugly as a man isn't that big of a deal!

I believe there are two main culprits when it comes to making men think that just by going to the gym or having a big dick you will become irresistible to women.

  • Pornography. In pornography most of the men are fit and have giant cocks. If you watch enough of it, you internalize that this is what women want. You also probably get the wrong ideas about what good sex is (hint: it's usually not going in dry and pounding a girl from behind as hard as you physically can). I don't think I need to explain this much more.

  • Feminization of men. This one is more insidious. We're constantly being told that women and men are the same. We're told that behaviors are entirely determined by the individual and are never related to gender. We also see that being physically attractive is the single most important attribute for a woman to attract a man. So, seeing as women and men are the same, you conclude that being physically attractive is the best way to attract women. This is how you get guys sending unknown women unsolicited pictures of their penis and expecting to get a favorable reaction. If a random fit woman sent me a nude photo, I would be ecstatic, so the reverse must be true as well (because women == men, right?). How man times have you heard guys lament, "why can't women just approach me?" Women are also being masculinized, but women have much more leeway to be androgynous than men do. This may also have a role in why Male-to-Female transsexuals are so much more common than Female-to-Male.

/r/NoFap Thread