I've put up with this because of the feelings that I have for him and for the times that we had before he went on medication and started using other stuff. I was blown away by how great things were or, maybe how great I believed them to be, in the beginning. I hate to leave someone that I feel so comfortable with, so myself.. someone who is going through some very difficult times.
On the other hand, I am at an age where I have goals that he obviously can't be part of in this state. He likes to throw my accomplishments in my face when he's bemoaning his own life. I worked as hard as I have not because it was easy, but because I wanted a better life. Someone using it as ammunition hurts.
He can't support a relationship - you're right. On top of these issues, his parents have used guilt to control him to the point of servitude. Still, whenever we have tried to take a break and stay friends, we always end up back together. I've tried to date other people casually during our longer break and he either works to ruin whatever I'm doing or shows up (only during these times lately) in order to confess his love and ask me to try again.
I've suggested a different doctor over and over again. He claims this is the one he was assigned and there's no one else nearby. There's always an excuse and I'm afraid that he's going to end up killing himself because he just won't find another doctor.
He does have overwhelming problems - problems that have become much worse in the time we've known each other. I hate turning away from him because I love him, we are best friends, as well. But I hate turning away because I know he could be better if he'd get counseling and proper medication. I can't make him so either, obviously.
But with all things considered.. yes, I'm near my breaking point. When he breaks plans, has skewed priorities, and his spouting his crap at me, I feel like I could legitimately smack him if he were here. He had another partner who he antagonized and provoked to violence... and to be honest, I've never felt this way before, but I can understand. I'm usually calm, easy going... my own personal reaction scares me and makes me sick.