3. Bi/pansexual ladies who have primarily dated men, have you come out to friends a...

Bi/pansexual ladies who have primarily dated men, have you come out to friends and family? When? Why?

First of all, I'm sorry for writing a novel here I'm not sure how this question turned into my life story haha! But here we go:

I'm 21 years old right now and I have only had two serious relationships in my life, one with a woman and my current relationship with a man, but most other hook ups/flings in my life have been with men. I have had a very confusing series of coming outs to my family and friends.

First, I came out to my friends as bisexual when I was about 14. It was relatively easy and they were all very accepting and supportive, some of them even said they already kinda suspected it about me. Then, when I was 16, I started dating my first girlfriend and shortly after I started identifying as a lesbian. I just had no interest in men at that point in my life, which is pretty understandable because I was completely invested in my relationship with my girlfriend.

My coming out as a lesbian was much harder than the first time. I wasn't even out AT ALL to my parents yet, when my mom basically dragged me out of the closet after finding some private conversation logs on a shared family computer. She was completely unsupportive and the whole situation was pretty traumatizing for me, and the hard feelings lasted about a year. That year was extremely difficult for me and I feel like my sexuality put a wedge in my relationship with my mom and was the cause of many fights. That went on until my mom made the effort to arrange an outing for us to go out for dinner and see a play together. While out at dinner she made sure I knew she was always going to be there for me and loved me no matter who I dated. She even started crying in the middle of the restaurant. It was pretty emotional for me as well after a year of feeling so detached from her. It felt like I was getting my mom back after a year of not having one.

Around the 3 year mark, my relationship with my girlfriend started to fail in a lot of different ways, and as it was ending I realized that "lesbian" didn't actually fit for me and started identifying as pansexual. I didn't tell any of my friends about that until after I'd moved on and started seeing someone else, my current boyfriend, about 4 months after the break up. My friends were confused at first but it's been about a year and a half now and they're just as supportive as they always were in my teens. My mom was surprised but happy that I was once again happy after being miserable for a while in my past relationship. So yeah, that's that.

TL;DR I came out as bisexual at 14, then lesbian at 16, then pansexual at 20. My friends were supportive, but confused. My mom was unsupportive at first but came around after a year. Now everything's great. :)

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