I don't think you're out of line or overreacting.

He did several things that I find really questionable: Slapping you without asking if it was okay, slapping you SO HARD that it left a bruise, not noticing (or caring?) that you clearly weren't into the sex anymore, showing no remorse the next morning over having left a visible bruise, a barely adequate attitude when you told him you were serious, and later invalidating your feelings when you felt too uncomfortable to even sleep in bed with him. Then "punishing" you, or at least putting the responsiblity on you, with his "no more rough sex if you can't handle it" line, when it was him that screwed it up in the first place! What, now it's your fault you'll only have vanilla sex if he doesn't get to do whatever he wants without asking? Just a string of bad decisions and lack of empathy on his part.

I'll say it's your decision if you do want to have "rough" sex with him or not, just know that "rough" or passionate doesn't have to mean degrading to you. You don't have to let him call you a slut or let him hurt you for it to be wild/rough/fun. Sit down with him, tell him exactly how his actions made you feel, and establish boundaries with him over what is allowed and what isn't. If he can't respect your wishes and still gets pissy, that is a major, MAJOR red flag.

Your last paragraph makes me think that due to your history of abuse, you are prone to doubting yourself and questioning yourself if you're overreacting, and are thinking a woman that hadn't been abused would maybe act differently and take it in stride. But please, trust your feelings and your gut. It's not normal that your partner slaps you hard in the face during sex, doesn't give a shit when you completely stop participating and later tries to play it off as funny, or acts like you're somehow too sensitive. You deserve to be treated with care and respect by your partner, otherwise I don't see how you can trust him.