Recently divorced, been in almost exclusively bad relationships. Got some childhood shit going on.
That said, after much consideration, i can acknowledge that I'm a pretty sensitive individual, and that i get pretty upset when my emotions aren't treated respectfully. Call me high maintenance all you want, congrats, you're my ex wife.
I have zero trouble maintaining relationships at a distance, but when individuals start poking my feels with little to no empathy or respect, I just don't have the time or effort. I need someone with the patience and maturity to treat me well. But of course, I understand no one probably wants to spend the time or effort to do so.
Additionally, I considered the goal of relationships are to start a family. Well. If you do that, you can kiss 90-95% of the rest of your life goodbye. I'm not sure people consider this. I resented tf out of someone else trying to monopolize my life, which made things even worse.
So if "starting a family" doesn't seem like it would be an interesting hobby to you, don't do it.
You gotta know why you're starting a relationship and where it's going and you gotta be certain about with the other person, but you also have to do it in an acceptable way. You can't walk into a first date with a clipboard and questionnaire and start rules-lawyering them.
Know what you want. Be sure where you're going and what your goals are. Don't be afraid to be alone.