To answer your first question, we just have to get through the holidays! Most of what you’re saying is correct, I just want to give one quick correction for clarity’s sake. My ma actually did get help to cope. She saw a therapist for almost 10 years. You know how they teach you in therapy to be selfish and put your own emotional well-being first? My ma exemplified that. She doesn’t do anything she “doesn’t feel she can can handle” which was way harder when I just needed a ride to school or dinner or whatever else kids need. But thank you for your perspective! It was very hard to feel like a burden while grieving everything I’d lost, but I’m hoping to keep moving forward.