I also live in Canada and have the pleasures of dealing with a high conflict ex, our court order is very specific, down to how and when we communicate. I’ll give you some things that are in our order but the biggest thing I would focus on is getting a court order and sticking to the court order (never ever straying from it).
in our court order we have a 24 hour cooling down period. If I email my ex, he has to wait 24 hours before he can respond back. (Except in the event of an emergency).
right of refusal (this one was very important to me). Basically if he or I can’t be with the kids (or a blood relative) we have to give the other parent the option to take the kids before we can hire a sitter
we only communicate via email, we never: hardly ever do exchanges (he picks kids up from school, I drop them off) as to limit contact.
our pick up/drop off days and times are down to the hour. For exampleI pick them up on Boxing Day at 12 from his house
the parent getting access, drives to the other parent. So if we have to do an exchange on s holiday or weekend, the parent who doesn’t have the kids but is getting them, drives to the other parents house. It seems petty but it was a constant topic we argued over. Now that it’s in the order- no argument.
both parents must be listed with schools, sports, etc. It’s the responsibility of each parent to be involved and not the responsibility of either parent to involve the other
obviously in Canada child support is a set amount and therefore no negotiation needs to occur. However I had the day and method in which he paid added (e-transfer)
you’ll have to work out section 7 expenses too. For ours, it was $700 per kid, per calendar year and my ex and I would have to discuss the expense before hand before the expense was incurred
I have final say in the event of a disagreement
I have the legal right to name a guardian in my place if I was to die. Which would be my parents and my ex knew about this.
If there is a topic you guys normally argue over, I would have the solution added to the agreement. If you make a habit out of switching days, meeting at other spots then in the agreement, it becomes a pointless agreement, so really stick to it.