Can't move on from a past relationship.

One: If you want to try again, it doesn't hurt to ask her to coffee and catch up and tell her you miss her. Has she dated other people, or is she currently dating someone?

Two: It can be really hard to let yourself become vulnerable again after being hurt. It's also really difficult to accept an event that changes your life. Are you sure that she's the only one for you?

Whenever I lost a relationship that was very important to me, I always made a list of the things that I knew I wanted in a future partner/spouse/relationship, and tried my best not to consider what I had lost but to envision what I would need for a good relationship. Once you have that, you may realize that you guys were going in different directions and that you want someone who can commit to you 100%. Someone who wants to stick with you to support your goals and who doesn't want to see what life is like without you. The right person won't ever care to know what that is like.

Talking to a girl friend about this might also be helpful, because it might help you become vulnerable to a female outside of a romantic setting. Relying on my friends was the only thing that got me through some painful breakups, and reminded me that there are a lot of people out there who could be a good fit for me.

Sometimes love isn't always enough. Think about where you want to go with your whole life-- where you want to live, what you want to do for a career and how a SO will fit into that. Don't dwell on the things you've lost because it makes it hard to see something better for yourself.

Good luck! You can do it. Joining social activities and doing things that give you purpose are great ways to get back up on your feet. There is no time limit for grief, and just because you're not over it yet doesn't mean you never will be.

/r/relationship_advice Thread