CMV: I believe that to reduce unwanted sexual contact (Sexual Harassment), victims need to act smarter.

Preventing 15% of all rapes strikes me as a positive step. Shoot, even preventing 5% of all rapes strikes me as a positive step.

That's fine when the advice is reasonable, but it also creates a culture where women are encouraged and expected to do behaviors that actively harm their life for the sake of preventing a tiny risk. The point is that while their is also something you could have done, at some point it exceeds reasonableness.

For instance, I like to jog at night ( 7-11 about). I live in a safe, well lit neighborhood, carry pepper spray and bring my 70 pound pit bull with me. But no matter what I do, people will still tell me "a girl shouldn't go out at night." Now, I don't have time to do it any other time, and a gym is expensive and inconvenient(I don't own a car.) For me, their advice really means "don't exercise."

It also worsens when the advice is contradictory. For instance, if you live in a big city, people will tell you to not walk at night. Well what do you do then? Take a cab to your house I guess. But wait! You're not supposed to let the cab driver see your house directly, in case he comes back later and tries to rape you. Well you could get a friend to take you I, but now you're not supposed to be alone men anymore. I hope you have a female friend that owns a car, is free tonight, and willing to take you from wherever you were out too. Oh no one's available? I suppose the only way to not get raped is to not go outside in the first place. This scenario may seem ridiculous, but I've been told each of these personally. If I were to follow them, I wouldn't be able to live my life at all.

There's always another "don't walk at night" or "don't be alone with anyone" and it often causes us to lose sight of how "reasonably protecting oneself" in practicality can actually be very unreasonable.

/r/changemyview Thread Parent