CMV: Having sexual preferences excluding transgender people is not transphobic

Look. I can agree with you on this if you admit that it is identical to the case of some racist wanting his preferences accommodated.

Why would I admit to such an obviously ridiculous equivocation? These things are not the same. The chance of any given sexual encounter being with someone whose consent would be withdrawn if racial heritage was mentioned is so vanishingly small that it would be ridiculous. Unwillingness to sleep with a trans person is not remotely as uncommon and has a MUCH more direct effect on sex. A woman who is 1/64th black has no difference sexually from one who isn't. A post-op transwoman does not have female genitals, they have altered male genitals. There is an objective difference there. One is 100% perception, the other is based on a fact of their biology.

Also, let's turn this around. Let's say the trans woman is NOT post-op. She is female passing in every other way, but still has a penis. Would you consider it unreasonable for her to fail to disclose that? Is not wanting to have sex when that is learned "nothing more than projection"?

A trans person's appearance is not an act of concealment. It is their appearance.

If you have had surgery and medical procedures that fundamentally alter your entire biology and never once mention this in the entire process of getting from meeting someone to sleeping with them, odds are you are deliberately avoiding mentioning it.

But I am failing to see any sort of obligation that should be thrust upon someone to accommodate another person's unstated and arbitrary preferences that they can't discern with their own senses.

That obligation is called "consent" and it indicates that if something about you is likely to make any significant number of people unwilling to have sex with you and you conceal it so you can still have sex with them, you're a terrible person at best and in many places, a rapist.

/r/changemyview Thread Parent