As a child, I was out of control. I was stealing, lying, cheating, wouldnt do any chores etc. As an adult, I am eternally grateful that my parents had the patience to put up with me. I remember as a kit, taking away privileges did absolutely nothing for me. I used to enjoy sitting i my closet alone, making up stories about fantasy lands and fictional characters. I did not mind losing any privileges for extended periods of time. When my parents would hit me though, I felt those consequences intensely, and always avoided the behaviours that lead to the beatings. I use the word beatings because they were not spankings, they were beatings. I am from India as well, and in the Indian community, EVERYONE beats their children. I did not know of even peer in my schools or apartment buildings who were not getting beaten. I think that greatly normalized the experience for me, now that I live in Canada, I think it would have been harder for me to deal with the beatings as I would have been the anomaly. Anyway, I am 26 years old, well adjusted and happy, well educated, good job, happy relationships. I have never assaulted another person, and never had the desire to. I think the beatings were helpful, and effective, I actually, in my adulthood, have thanked my parents for doing it. In a way, it even showed me they loved me, and it helped me curb my poor impulse control. It helped me get better at managing my own behaviours. I plan to be a parent one day, I hope not to spank, but I was a completely out of control child, more so than the average. If I end up with a child like myself, I would use spanking as a last resort, and ensure to stay within the legalities of my area of residence. I think what needs to be understood is that most parents dont WANT to spank their children, but sometimes the child is so out of control that something drastic needs to be done. As a child, a parent is the legal guardian and makes the tough decisions, it is a parents job to ensure the child becomes a well adjusted adult, who is capable of functioning well in society. My parents were both working full time, dealing with health stresses, and raising children. I am happy they did not push themselves to the point of breakdown/exhaustion and did what they needed to do. If I had to do it again, I wouldnt change a thing. Maybe the studies show certain patterns, but there are exceptions to every rule, and I was one of them. Im so glad they didnt send me away to some troubled child camp, I looked to them for guidance, and I was happy to accept their choices and decisions.