OP, more than anything else, the fundamental definition of conservatism, is a desire for individual independence, and an unwillingness to be dominated by centralised, collectivist power. The reason why conservatives do not want said dominance, is because personal experience has taught them that the majority of human beings can not be trusted, and human beings in authority can be trusted even less.

I understand that modern conservatism has had a lot of red herrings or irrelevant issues associated with it; white supremacy and so on. To the extent that I consider myself conservative, however, (and I've been told several times by people here, that I definitely am) it has three definitions.

a} I do not trust mechanical or electronic technology, for the most part; and I don't believe that its' introduction to society has fundamentally increased our level of real happiness.

b} I don't trust the future, which I think for the most part, is only going to bring more of what I dislike in the present. More dehumanising electronics, more apathy and human disconnection, more greed, more political oppression, and more destruction of the environment.

c} I don't trust the majority of other human beings, who I believe are largely motivated by the acquisition of wealth, status, and control of each other. I have no interest in any of these three things. I also have no desire to live as part of a large scale collective with other human beings, most of whom have beliefs and priorities which I consider suicidal.

I also don't give a damn about universal healthcare, due to having lost a kidney to medical malpractice. I don't trust the police or believe in gun control, because I've had home invasions and nearly been killed when the police were nowhere to be seen.

If you believe in large scale collectivism; if you believe in a gigantic, centralised government that is going to shelter and protect you, then I can only assume that you've been much more fortunate than I have. You have never needed police, and then not had them show up. In short, you've never your beliefs about reality genuinely tested, because if you had, you would not now hold said beliefs.