Great to hear that you are open and vulnerable. My father does not want to speak about this topic, there is too much trauma connected to his drinking and he just can't handle it. I understand this, but I find it hard to respect him for it. Which I hate about myself. But that you can speak about it is great, especially if you do it for them.

But, do take that Superman cape. You are their father, you can be their hero :). My father was my hero, but he never picked up that role again, he tried to stand on the same level. But your kids need a father.

You already sound like a hero though. Your attitude to live by the day and make them good is great. I can tell, I adopted this 'carpe diem' mindset 19 days ago (the same day that my girlfriend broke up with me, though I made the decision before she did) and every one of them did, and I cannot imagine how good my life will become if I keep doing this. And I cannot imagine that I will ever quit.

And the fact that you quit alcohol also was a great example to them, indeed, that you are human, that you struggle as well, but that people can overcome such difficulties through love and discipline.

Btw, fellow triathlete here :). I pressume you are one as well, judging by your nickname.

All the best!