Daddy and baby: does your baby's dad take care of nighttime wake-ups? How long has he done it and how does he soothe baby?

It kinda seems like you don't have much of a nighttime routine in place... you both should look into figuring that part out, and I have to admit, because you are BFing, you are kinda stuck doing most of the work. It kind of seems fruitless for your H to get baby from crib, bring baby to you, for you to nurse and hand him/her over again to your H. I co-slept with my little one and am still doing so, and I don't even breastfeed, I was doing this because it was easier for me to wake up, give her a bottle and put her back to bed. She goes to bed at 9pm and wakes up only once in the middle of the night and is up again in the morning, but she used to wake every 3h. Even so, my H would've never just kept her up in the living room at midnight. It kinda seems like you two need to communicate and figure out a system that works for the both of you so he can help out adequately. Last night, my H did the "night shift" alone for the first time but we went over a bunch of pointers before he did so (I was away for the evening). Everything went smoothly. I understand your frustration BTW am not trying to say this is your fault - reading your post I was mad at your H for you but then I wonder, if he's so clueless and everything is so out of place, what does a normal night (where you are in charge) look like and is he not aware of how things normally go? Another thing, sorry I'm rambling - we have a super high needs baby who essentially cries all the time and I have been the only one to be able to soothe her and it's not even because I'm breastfeeding it's because we spent more time together therefore we bond more therefore I am more "able" with her... slowly but surely when my H went back to work he started to lose "touch" with the baby, she'd start crying and he'd try to hold her or soothe her but she only wanted her mommy. I read that this is normal for a lot of babies and stabilizes in the toddler years where daddy is now able to be more involved in the bedtime routine (bath, story, rocking to sleep etc).

/r/beyondthebump Thread