DAE feel like abandonment is just a matter of when and accept it now?

Im honestly starting to realize that a lot of people who aren't as affected by abandonment/have never experienced it seem to think that inevitable abandonment is the norm of human relationships and that people should just "get over" being abandoned, which is fucked up. Not fearing being thrown away is "healthy" when actually people shouldn't be abandoning people, or at least not doing it in extremely fucked up ways, in the first place.

I have a boyfriend I live with and while I'm not like, completely emotionally unattached from him I am not super attached to him either because I'm scared of loving anybody as much as i loved the person I dated before my current boyfriend. My previous ex turned out to be a spineless and emotionally abusive/manipulative piece of shit and he abandoned me in a pretty fucked up way for reasons that basically boil down to that i was inconvenient for him. Of course, he abandoned me after he made tons of promises not to and after proposing to marry me.

I never ever ever want to experience anything like that ever again. So I will just simply not get attached.

/r/BPD Thread