Dealing with a hard call.

Hey, I hope you’re doing a bit better now it’s been a few days. Keep seeing your therapist, keep talking to your trusted people. I just wanted to contribute three things:

  1. To reiterate that our job is to serve not to save. People die. Even when we do everything right sometimes it’s not enough to “save” someone. But we can always serve. Try to make a difference where you can, even if it’s just a little thing. Make time to comfort the bystanders, tidy up the floor or feed their pets before you leave. Any little thing that helps to smooth things over. I like to talk to the recently deceased - the auditory centres of the brain are the last to “switch off” when we die, so I tell them what I’m doing. “I’m going to clean your face now, ok Bob?” Or “we’re going to roll you over, Jane. Ready?” It’s weird but it helps me feel connected and to show my respect. Ask your mentors about how they process.

  2. As for the visual flashbacks and any body horror you may still be dealing with, I find it helps to get those images “out of your head” by either writing about them, drawing or some other practical outlet. It gives your brain a way to externalise the processing a bit. And I find it helps when I don’t treat the flashbacks like intruders, but rather as a reminder that I still have work to do. I try to reframe them as visits from a friend who wants to help.

  3. Lastly, remember that during big jobs like this we are sympathetically activated. Before our parasympathetic system can reinstate its influence we have to let the sympathetic system run its course. So move your body, get the blood pumping and breathe hard until you feel better. I do martial arts because it’s a safe way to give my body an outlet for the fight in the fight and flight response.

Keep up the good work.

/r/Paramedics Thread