‘Deep and heartfelt sorrow’ was too much. Here’s how a parliamentary motion to remember Prince Philip was watered down

What the fuck did you just fucking say about Her Majesty is the Queen of Canada, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Forces, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on the French and the Yankies, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in line infantry warfare and I'm the top grenadier in the entirety of Her Majesty's armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before in the Dominion, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over carrier pigeon? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the colonies and your township is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, frog. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of Her Majesty's Navy and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the colony, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.

/r/CanadaPolitics Thread Parent Link - thestar.com