Discovered my 9 year old girl texting very inappropriate things. Need advice on how to confront her about it

My sibling shared to me that he had the birds and bees convo with my nephew who is 8. It was described to him as a big secret he can’t tell his younger brother, but very factual. He took it very maturely and asked questions. While he didn’t know about sex prior to this, he learned it from an adult, rather than movies or peers.

I thought he was out of his mind (non parent here, who didn’t really understand sex/pregnancy until I was 12. Ironically I was molested and was privately sexual (as a result of this) as a 6/7 year old, and had sexual fantasies early on. I had no information on sex and when my molestor would do these things to me I thought I would get pregnant, even though there was no possibility of this happening because the physical act did not involve penetration.

So yeah it’s a conversation that should be had and your child should feel comfortable approaching you. I couldn’t approach anyone. I never did. In fact, I went as far checking myself out of sex ed as a pre-teen because I knew I couldn’t handle it after going through what I did- but not consciously. I thought my mother would not want me to learn about this because I was too young. I kind of parented myself there. This type of education didn’t come up in my parent’s culture when they were kids.

I learned the physical mechanics in biology in high school and I was not sexual in high school at all. It’s kind of weird. I just completely was averse to the whole thing growing up.

It took awhile to develop a healthy frame of mind around sex.

/r/Parenting Thread