You want a partner who wants to be with you, not who stays with you because there's nobody else available.

that was incredibly helpful to hear honestly. it is crazy because just in the little bit of time it has been since i realized this about myself, the sick to my stomach feeling at the thought of her meeting someone else has disappeared. i know i am a good person and treat her well and do my best to be my best every day, and do my best to be the best partner i can be. if that isnt enough then it just wasnt meant to be! we have really great communication so i also trust that if there was an issue between us, she would discuss that with me rather than just getting with another person. thanks for the feedback and words of wisdom. in the meantime ill work on these issues, even though just realizing them has already helped me feel like i am worthy.