I'll start off by giving credit where credit is due:

1 Ole Miss. You are the queens of the SEC. The Grove is a magical place. If heaven does indeed exist, I imagine it would be something like the grove in the middle of October.

2 South Carolina. This one is from experience. Because. Damn. Tailgates there require for you to NOT wear sweatpants or gym shorts.

3 Tennessee. We've got some ridiculous chicks here. Like off the chart...and what's better....they know football. And love it.

4 Mississippi State. Yep. Miss State is pretty legit. Say what you want about the state of Mississippi....but you can't knock them for the ladies.

5 LSU - these girls will out drink you and do it while stealing your heart. Anytime we've had visitors from Baton Rouge in Knoxville, it has certainly been easy on the eyes.

6 Georgia - Georgia girls have mastered the red dress and black cowboy boot thing. Ain't no dawgs here.

7 Auburn - fun and classy. They know football too. Solid group.

8 Florida - Gainesville was awesome. Some traditional southern gals, but definitely not as prevalent as the majority of SEC schools. Some of them were absolute STUNNERS but there were definitely an influence of Jersey shore types that reduced the average score and probably raised the STD average here.

9 Arkansas Yeah kinda could use some work on and off the field here.

10 Alabama While some might say Katherine Webb....she went to Auburn. Bama girls are crazy. And not in the good way. If one wants you, she will hunt you down like you were her cousin on the hunt for snu snu. Beware of their tooth.

11 Kentucky - quick to take off their clothes. They are the trashier more hillbilly version of Tennessee. And the lack of quality education will leave you in the middle of mind numbing conversations.

12 Vandy - sorry y'all....but at least you'll have a good degree.

Mizzou and A&M joined the conference after I graduated so my recon would be pretty piss poor, and I'm not trying to get any of my men killed in the field.