All the time. When I took him back after he cheated and attacked me I remember thinking I wanted him to hurt as badly as I was hurting and I started mirroring his behaviour towards me back to him. I did the same to his mom who is also a narc. And now they are both trying to paint this picture of me as a crazy abuser. As someone else mentioned, the fact that you are even engaging in the type of self-reflection that lead you to question if you were the problem means that you are not a narcissist. All we can do now is unlearn the behaviours by focussing on filling our own cup instead of theirs. I honestly don’t know if I can ever recover from this, but I have to try not only for my own happiness but also for my 3 beautiful children who deserve at least one parent who can encourage healthy development and give them a space free from abuse of any kind.