Yes this 100% all the time :/

I truly don’t understand why I’m here. I feel like this existence was a mistake and I don’t belong to the human race. The disconnection I feel toward other people/humanity is profound and disquieting. I always feel like I’m just observing other people/life. I think this is a function of dissociation, trauma, depression, & like other posters have said pure-O & existentialism.

Idk I also don’t really understand or value feelings/love the way other people do. I have a deep mistrust of it and even if some form of “love” exists (obv don’t believe in unconditional/unimpeachable love bc who does) I don’t know why I should care about or put any stock into someone’s subjective, arbitrary feelings toward me. In some respects (in individual, discrete, granular moments) you’re just a means to someone else’s end and that disturbs me.