Hey, responding to this 8 days late but I just remembered this post because I've found myself browsing r/iamatotalpieceofshit... and for me, browsing it is a little bit triggering but mostly... I actually find it really healing in a way.

I suppose the message I'm getting from it is whilst abusers do exist, most of society rejects them and vilifies them, which makes me feel a lot safer. I've been feeling unsafe around everyone lately, so I guess seeing abusers get condemned by regular people outside of safe spaces means a lot to me.

I don't know if my anecdote will help you in any way at all... maybe you can find some comfort in how widely vilified places like theredpill are.