I think area matters a lot. I lived in CA for a long while after growing up in a small town and what I consider common sense is a big deal to them. From the victim complexes / entitlement to the keeping up with the joneses plus a dollop of "I don't make enough money to throw money at problems" problems. There's a lot of performative friendships and political correctness that is disposable at their convenience. Like, if you asked me where a company can ban the word "dude" for sexism and get hit by a class action sexual harassment lawsuit in the same year it's CA.

In the greater sphere it's because we live in a culture where we've adopted the opposite extreme of parenting. Kids are not expected to take any personal responsibility anymore. Everything is diagnosed, and the messaging that goes with it evolves into one of those "that's just the way I am" (translation: if you can't take me at my worst) catchphrases. I mean, only within the last 10 years have there been cases of kids attempting to sue their parents for tuition and the courts having to remind kids that parents cannot and should not be expected to clear all obstacles for them in their path to adulthood.

I consider myself a feminist but I've always been highly critical of the disney princess culture because it created a lot of adult children out of women, but with all the coddling nowadays it really cannot be said to be isolated with just women or just that one thing.

I think the happiest relationships will come from two people who are responsible without the extreme gender attitudes. People who treat potential partners like they're adversaries will be too miserable to be happy. On the one hand I left a guy who wouldn't lift a finger for any chores whatsoever because that was 'my job' since he made more money (a redpill ideology he took). On the other hand a friend of mine had a disastrous relationship where his gf demanded everything be equal down to the last penny. Every purchase or act was an accounting discussion for them (you'll also find them in every women's rights, lgbt or blm rally). The person I wound up marrying is on the conservative side with a similar background to me without the weird hangups. Conversely I don't mind being the one to run the household if I don't have to waste my breath arguing over trivial things.

In retrospect I just consider it immature, like that kid who tries to weasel with the teacher when it would take them less energy to just do the thing in good faith. My biggest frustration was having to deal with people in their mid 20s behaving this way and being put in a position of having to explain why they can't afford to blow their savings on a dog or a trip to find themselves (literally happened) instead of fixing their car or paying back student loans. You'd think they'd know better by that age but no, they just retort that I'm privileged...except that while I don't personally care the irony doesn't escape me when it's coming from a bunch of white people who make more than my parents combined.

I should say I'm just a rando person passing by. I haven't read up on the pill ideologies since their inception.