Unsure if you decided to go. With great sympathy and a hand on your back, I'm sorry. A few months before quarantine, I had to put my dog, Luna Bear, down. A few days later, I did go to OTF. I walked in, signed up for a rower, and quickly walked back out because I burst into tears - my heart physically, palpably hurt. Staff didn't know anything, but allowed me to have my moment pacing, wiping tears. I went back in to do the workout as best as I could on that day. That said, in OTF or any environment, no one needs to see you wearing a happy face. It might feel good to let the tears flow (bring a towel). It might feel good to sweat it out and do what you can. Be well. And, again, I'm so sorry.