I know this post will be lost, but I feel like sharing it on the off-chance someone finds it. I'll admit, I've sent messages somewhat similar to this. Not this extreme, I mean Christ some of this made me cringe. But there's been times where I asked where she was, what she was doing, and why she was acting certain ways. There are two sides to every story though, and I was mentally crushed by this woman. I was cheated on a total of three times that I know of. I was lied to so often, I never knew what was real and what wasn't. It tore me apart, because she could be one of the most amazing ladies in the world. It's like there were two of her, and you could tell when the "evil her" (lol) was around just by the look in her eyes. She had borderline personality disorder and I'm saying her personality shifts were extreme. It was heartbreaking, because I was deeply in love with the "real" her. Despite being completely faithful, I was forced to give up all my female friends, I had to change so much about myself for her, while she gave up nothing. I only looked at her phone once, and what I seen traumatized me so much- I couldn't work up the courage to ever touch it again. The girl screwed with my mind so bad, that after 8 years of that- I'm terrified to get into another relationship. I'm absolutely terrified to even go on a date with a woman. It kills me, because once in a while people bring her up and talk about what she's doing. I just want it all to go away. Sometimes things aren't so black and white. With a little less self-control and some more trauma, I coulda been a guy sending those texts. I don't want to be that guy.

-For the record, even after the second time she cheated- I tried to trust her again and stop asking questions. I never yelled at her for going out with her friends ect ect- she even went out to dinner or the movies with male friends. The third time, I completely lost the ability to do that- and I started becoming the guy in those texts messages. I had to leave, despite being begged to stay. She was sleeping with another guy at the time too, and wanted to "Take a small break then get back together". I didn't love her because I wouldn't accept that. Oh, I could go on. Anyhow, thanks for listening to my pointless rambling. PPS- Physical harm is never acceptable and I never dreamed of hitting her. I still have nightmares about the relationship a few times a month.