I think the problem here is that he is fourteen years older than you, and you are barely out of your teenage years. There’s a big power imbalance at stake. You do not hold a job, never have, never experienced anything in the real world (bills, mortgages, money management). It’s actually quite sad. I am assuming he was focused on it “not being a big deal” as you said, when in reality, that wasn’t the point. I understand, you just wanted to feel included in something. After all, you said you didn’t really even know much about selling that home. Your husband keeps yelling at you that you don’t want the marriage to work, when really it’s him. Running small things by your partner is a way to gain trust, which is something you two lack. You have close to none. I trust my neighbor more than you trust your husband. I don’t suspect my neighbor is out to get me. You need a therapist. One that will mediate this entire situation. I was a counselor for 6 years then quit to raise my daughters. I was so overwhelmed that I started seeing a counselor because I couldn’t take advice I gave to clients everyday to six years. You about sound at your mental breaking point. You’re going through cycles of love, hate, sadness, grief. Yes, grief. You’re grieving an image of what you thought your husband was. I think he needs to be more understanding of that fact he has done far more damage than a few “I am sorry’s” will fix. This runs deep. As far as the intimacy goes, you are young. For right now you may think you’re going to be able to go you’re entire life without sex, but the truth is, you can’t. You are going to eventually want to be intimate with someone. If you continue to get infections after sexual intercourse with him, he needs to see a doctor ASAP. If you have told him it only happens after him, and he continues to try to place blame elsewhere, then you do not need him as a sexual partner period. He isn’t respecting your body by putting you at risk.