I don't know if this is /r/army relevant but fuck it, I'm drunk. Here's the better son you all need, Felix. He's on profile like a shammer.

Shammer has at least 2 9 lines and some kind of police action and apparently is a stud. He needs some dibs on some beef or at least some turkey. He also has some issues that he can only look up so you need to help him out as his BB.

You seem upset. He can't drink. His doc said no booze... so he's the "babysitter" and you're kinda mad because he isn't going to play? He will play soon.

Here's the TMC suggestion. You haven't gone there yet with him but I want to be psychic....

1) High protein diet - he needs chicken, turkey, spam (<- I question spam but he'll eat it)

2) High attention needs - he shouldn't do PT but you need to follow the profile and he needs to use the cone to his best ability

3) Lots of good dog praise when he replies and responds

4) "I need to pee" will be something you need to work on because he can't do the same things as before. Pay attention

5) He still adores you and loves you like you love him (girly moment) so he's still your buddy. He can't hang right now. He will in a few days

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