UPDATE: NSis has now sent me a tacky hallmark card in an attempt to guilt-trip me into breaking NC (a family of photoshopped meerkats with silly hats captioned "Just think about what it's like being in our family!" - or something - recycled it immediately).

NMum, true to form, has texted saying "I'm worried that you are unhappy, and it's because it's me. You can always come back to us, free of anger or blame" - which is inCREDibly shady considering her last email said I'd have to come crawling back on my knees if I ever wanted to contact them again.

Coincidentally, my texting app has a "blacklist" feature! I should have looked into this previously...