I don’t know how old you are, but surely it’s possible to change at least the changeable things you hate so much about your life. You got a lot of scholarships and are finishing (or finished?) college, that means that you’re an intelligent and hard-working person. It means that maybe you would hate the job your degree would offer you, but once you’re done with college you can look for any job you want. Wasted time? In a world where they ask for a certificate to state that one can wipe their ass clean, a degree is never wasted time. But it doesn’t mean that you have to follow it 100%. As far as your hobbies are concerned, whatever they are leave yourself time for them. They make life feel better. I’ve also been there, and without video games, books, art, I’d probably be dead already. The time you dedicate to them depends mostly on you. If you don’t have money right now, then find a part time job. Anything is better than nothing at all. It will give you a bit more peace of mind. What I mean is, in life there are some things we cannot change, whether we like them or not. But a lot of it we can actually change, so if anything of what you loathe can be modified, do it. Start with one thing and see how it feels. Good luck for everything.