Dr. K help me with my toxic hyper winner mindset, it's a curse. (A bit older/wiser now)

Sounds like a sad life, to be honest. Think about it. Every action you undertake is done with the singular intent of making sure that you demonstrate to others how inferior they are to you. You're basing your whole existence around a desire to subjugate and bend the people in your life to your ego.

You can't let your happiness rely on being better than everyone. Not only is it just a toxic outlook that's going to harm your ability to sustain interpersonal relationships, it's just not a goal you can possibly achieve. Someone will always be better than you at something. You're in medicine? Cool, there will always be doctors who are better than you at what you do. You make a lot of money? Cool, someone else makes more.

Even if you become the absolute best in the world at one discipline. Eventually you get older, and your mind and body begin to fade, and someone surpasses you as the greatest. Or maybe you switch disciplines again, picking some other thing to become better at. But time is inescapable. You'll be surpassed by someone else in everything you do. You'll become a feeble old man, seething at how you can't even get around on your own two feet anymore. Your strength and intelligence will wither away. Unless you're one of the tiniest handful of most influential historical figures to ever live, all of your earthly accomplishments will fade into obscurity before too long. Comparing yourself to others is a game you always lose in the end.

You mentioned that you picked your career just so that you could one-up your sister. This is an admission that you're essentially acting in a sadistic way towards a loved one, hoping to tear her down and prove that she's inferior at the one thing she wants to accomplish with her life. You're taking pleasure in hurting your flesh and blood. I can only hope that she's more internally-motivated than you are, and that she can find satisfaction in the simple act of living out the career she loves for no reason other than its own sake.

Sorry man, but all of this reeks of an extreme inferiority complex. You're massively insecure, and you fight every moment of your life to prove to others and/or yourself that you're good enough. Your ego is controlling every aspect of your existence.

/r/Healthygamergg Thread