3. The drug psilocybin from psychedelic mushrooms caused lasting positive personali...

The drug psilocybin from psychedelic mushrooms caused lasting positive personality and behavior changes. These changes were pro-social, i.e. can "benefit other people or society as a whole." New research from Johns Hopkins, October 2017.

I started dabbling with psychedelics during the lowest period of my life, alone in a filthy apartment, almost the closest I've ever been to suicide.

Two hours of excitement and energy as it built up. Gained a new appreciation for music. Smiled for perhaps the first time in many, many years.

And then I plunged into utter despair. The pain was so bad all I could do was lay on the floor in a ball and moan as my head filled with hateful thought I'd ever had about myself--and after a lifetime of abuse, trauma, and humiliation, there were a LOT of hateful thoughts.

Going into the fourth hour my mind, a tangled mess of yarn that would have given Alexander the Great pause, began unraveled itself and I saw my abuse for what it was: something awful inflicted upon me by a despicable father. One tightly wound strand pulled free after the next, and I could see my own thought patterns clearly for the first time.

I pulled away at all the horrible stuff that had accumulated over a wasted lifetime filled with senseless pain and suffering, and I saw the goodness that lay beneath that mess. I reached down and I grabbed at it and I hauled it up and out of the tangles with all my might, and I sobbed.

I sobbed and I sobbed for hours. Long after the psilocybin had worn off I kept crying. For close to a week after that I would break into tears of joy when I was alone.

I cleaned up the filthy apartment. I poured my bourbon and other drugs down the drain. I lost over 40 pounds. Within a month I was on a date with a cute girl, sipping wine and eating duck. I sold my first story. Got to meet a hero of mine. I turned my life completely around.

I'd probably be dead today, in prison, or on the streets. I couldn't have done it without years of therapy that preceded my psychedelic trip, but all the therapy and antidepressants in the world never could have given me the series of epiphanies that changed my life.

I would have been just another severely depressed person suffering until death.

It was horrific and beautiful and more than I could ever have hoped for, and I've never experienced anything more beautiful or poignant since. No other shroom trip ever came close.

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