I know you think I'm being insensitive but I don't really like the message I'm getting from this story. I can understand that OP is going through some rough times but blaming all his problems on this incident is an attitude I don't appreciate.

It's a problem you're faced with OP, and making sob stories full of self-pity won't get you anywhere. It may sound harsh but knowing there will be tons of people here to support you emotionally, I think that at least one person should tell you the truth. The thing about depression and aniexty is that it's mostly a solo battle. And to be honest, it's not always good to get lots of hugs for your sad story because then you start to feel that it's okay to be this way. That people give you attention and "love" so long as you make them feel bad for you. Sadly this is something that's only possible temporarily unless you keep going to different communities. It's just the nature of things. People don't like talking to negative people for a long time and certainly not to people who appear to hate themselves. These people in the comments saying their heart goes to you won't even remember you by next week. I doubt anyone would even give constant effort to check up on you and talk to you. It's something you're going to have to face on your own. Believe in yourself that you can become better instead of some empty internet comments. People change all the time and you have more influence over it than you'd think.

Maybe I'm reading too much into this. if so, just ignore my comment. But from the way you wrote the post, it tells me that depression and anxiety are a big problem you are dealing with (another reason why writing is important!). You have my empathy and I hope you change your attitude.

Also, I'm not asking for some kind of grammatical perfection here. My gramma r isn't all that great either. I don't care if you mispelled and accidentally added another letter or whatever. But he's making the most basic mistakes that kids in middle school don't make. It's better I tell him now that his writing is terrible (and that's not even what I said the first time) before people treat him like he's stupid.