OK advice time (if you see this at all). I dated this actor guy. Sort of successful (or enough to be making just enough of a living out of it). He was one charming motherfucker. Like knees weak arm's are heavy shit.
I knew from the get go that he had an alcohol issue and that he dabbled in coke once in a while but wasn't addicted anymore. As a former coke addict (ten years this year!) I thought that "Awww I could change him". Never really works.
On his birthday, I reserved a table at his favourite restaurant. I picked my favourite dress and heels. I knew he was going through some stuff (depression) but I wanted to try and cheer him up at least for a night. He was supposed to show up at 7 to pick me up. Well, he didn't show. 7:30, 8, 8:30....finally around 9 I get a text. Something stupid like, "Hahaha sorry lol" I asked him what the fuck happened and where he is. He said he was drunk ... and driving. I asked him to stop. At this point I started freaking the fuck out. He said he wouldn't stop unless I send him a nude. Well fuck it, "There's your fucking nude. STOP. THE. CAR"
Radio silence for another hour. Then I got a call. All he said was to come to his place and help him. Took a cab there. Door was half open and I find him on the floor covered in his own vomit and coke.
Again I tried to help by just being there. I knew how it worked. I've been going through it myself all those years ago. Last thing I want to do was make him feel bad about himself. Looking back on it, I wish I had been a bit sterner. He had his meltdowns. The emotional abuse got worse and worse to the point where I was crying every damn day because he'd call me worthless. Eventually it came to a point where he hit me and I was out. I broke up with him even though I absolutely loved him so damn much. One of the worst break-ups of my life.
So I suppose there's no real advice here BUT I will tell you to stay strong. TRUST me it gets better. Do not fall for it again. Things will not change. This isn't some "Hit the gym, call the lawyer, delete facebook" BS advice. It does not get better. If they can't help themselves and take advantage of your kindness, you need to remove yourself from it.
All the best to you. If you need to talk, PM me.