Thanks for the reply.
When we first had sex, honestly, it felt like i was barely brushing the sides. I know i'm above average size so this was a little weird for me. Considering she said she hadn't had sex in at least 4 months was a little strange that it was so loose. The sex isn't bad now, its actually great. I think shes been doing various exercises to tighten the muscles. But all the other women I have been with are noticeably tighter. I understand everyone is different, but I couldn't help but continue to think that perhaps it was tighter before, considering how much looser she is in comparison. What doesn't help is i dated an absolute nympho for 2 weeks (she must have slept with 100s of people), and her vagina feels similar to my GF's, so this association probably doesn't help. As sometimes, i do think of whether my GF slept around a lot as she is looser than what i've experienced (from reading I know the vagina isnt affected by the amount of people you've slept with - so this is me being stupid). I know she has had considerably more sexual partners than me, over 20 (i've had around 10). But I want to think of my GF in the best possible light and I do find myself thinking a little off course sometimes.
So the fact that hers was looser, my chain of thought was: its a lot looser than what i've had previously > shes had a child > the birth perhaps 'stretched' it and it didn't go back to original > some twat has already been here > that twats dick has been inside my girlfriend> he cummed inside > grosses me out/annoys me.
If she hadn't had a child i literally wouldn't have given it two thoughts. Its just she does have a kid, and this reminds me that someones been there before. All my ex's apart from one have all had other sexual partners before me. Thats fine. you can forget they had past relationships. But I have to be continually reminded of this particular ex of hers. Sorry about the poor explanation, its a little hard to describe what im thinking/feeling, but basically something in my head just doesn't sit well with this whole scenario. I have gotten better over the past year but i'm still not 100%.
One thing i did think about is perhaps when i have a child with her, then it wont feel like her ex has the "upper hand" anymore and i'd just get over it. But then what if i don't, and i continue feeling this way.