I think you being honest with yourself is key.

I’m a 41 year old male, these are some of my must haves. Everyone has the must haves and must have nots.

Some of my key things I want are:

• the connection and feeling that someone out there wants and needs you.

• someone that will pick up the phone and call, text, or video chat during the day but understanding that I work and have a kid, so I might be busy too, like you, which is fine

• I want to meet up with you, and when we do, I want to be able to kiss you, hold you and stare into your eyes, but some days I just want to snuggle.

• when we have sex, I don’t want it to be just plain old I’m going to go down on you and then we have missionary sex. I would like some reciprocation and spice things up a little, shouldn’t be me putting in all the effort and work.

• lastly, I want to feel comfortable around you so I can be myself and not hide my goofiness and silliness.

Those are a few things I want and I go with it. If I’m not happy, then why am I in this affair? You should ask yourself the same thing.