Aw, that sounds so hard. It sounds like if you didn't have a child eventually that would make you unhappy, I don't recommend giving up that dream for any relationship, even a perfect relationship.

You'll really have to have an in depth discussion with your partner and ask him these questions. Couples therapy might even be a great way to guide the discussion and get on the same page. I don't understand people who think they couldn't handle more than one child, and I'm surrounded by family men so I can't offer a whole lot on his perspective.

I'd seek therapy and decide if I was going to have a kid with him or with someone else. I also once thought I probably didn't want kids, but being an SP showed me that parenting is actually way more fun than people on CF subs say it is. I'm really glad I changed my mind and having a partner who is over the moon about having children with me is something that makes me very happy. Not sure if I could give of myself like that for someone who doesn't have the same family values as me and who isn't as into having the kid as I am.