I was the fat friend last night. I literally don't know what to do with myself.

It sucks. I waisted my 20’s already. I’m 29. I have an amazing boyfriend but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to like the way I look. And although I know he loves me I want him to legit like the way I look too. I look like crap. I’ll legit see myself from the front and think I look pretty good and then catch a side view and see how much of a double chin I have. I’ve built a lot of muscle and it almost feels like it doesn’t matter because I also need to lose fat. I lost 40lbs from 220lbs.. now I’m back up to 192lbs. So I’ve decided I’m going to buckle down the next two months and so how much I can change my habits and lose fat. Starting today till the 23rd of April. Then I’ll reevaluate and set a new goal. I want so badly to wear a bikini confidently. I want to run a 5k by thanksgiving. I want to be fit and confident. Even as a happily taken gal I want to generally be seen as attractive. Is that vain? Idk. Maybe. I don’t really care if it is. If you wanna join me send me a message! We will be for two months fitness inspos!

/r/loseit Thread