If she wants to get in shape
She asked not to focus on a goal weight. That's it. Any 'trainer' of any ability would easily find other goals to focus on. Being 'in shape' is such a broad, broad term that can almost mean anything.
If I a body builder and I come in to the same trainer and say 'I don't want to focus on a goal weight.' and the trainer retorts with 'Well, let's talk to you about a diet plan," I'd be fucking pissed. This guy is a trainer, I don't want nor asked for help from a nutritionist, and definitley not from a hack trainer that can't adapt to the possibility that there are people out there with different goals other than setting a goal weight.
The reason why there are fat tumblirinas out there is that there are hack people out there like you who are so polarized to defending a mindset that their kneejerk reaction makes great television, tumblrina blogs or whatever.
What the woman needed to say was "I don't need your help. Thank you very much. Can I speak to someone else that will listen and is able to create a plan that doesn't focus on weight and diet. I came here to exercise, not have some hack trainer force his assumptions of what I want on me."
This women wants to be treated like a hero because of all the mental anguish she's been through
You're making very broad assumptions on the mention of "ED" She may have been anorexic or food addiction. You have absolutely no idea.
And to extract this 'she wants to be treated like a hero' You're really injecting your narrative and putting words into her mouth.
Sure, she's of the Fat Tumblrina mindset, but it sounds like her trainer was of the /r/fatpeoplehate hivemind, of which, you have as well.
When two shitty mindsets come together, nothing comes of it.
I'll give her a looooot of leeway. Sure, she's a fat tumblrina, she walks through the front door of my gym, she's the idiot, which is fine. She's got fatlogic. That is fine.
If she gets a partisan hack, with a mindset like yours, sure, she gets triggered. Because she gets someone that is completely fixated on weight.
If she gets someone like me, who would be educated, have experience with many different clients of many different goals, then I say 'great, it's much easier to work with someone who has defined goals of what they want and don't want. If weightloss is not your goal, then I can guarantee that I can make a program for you that focuses on getting stronger, feeling more healthy, with benefits that translate into better well being in all areas of your life.' Not all trainers focus on yelling and screaming at people telling them that they're fat pieces of shit untill the FPOS throws up.
If a three year old goes home and cries to mommy about a shitty trainer, it doesn't make the shitty trainer any better as a trainer if he's actually shitty.