It's funny you mention that, because if there's the one thing I truly enjoy in this world, it's driving. My car isn't anything special, but it's mine and when I'm out and about, everything else seems to melt away and not even matter. I wouldn't say it's a happiness or a contentment, but rather something that keeps me occupied. A nice distraction.

A little story time I guess, I have nothing better to do right now. I grew up in a very rural community. I lived on the edge of my town, and wasn't but a block or two from dirt roads and county highways. It took five minutes of driving to get out to a point where you'd barely see another car, and the roads went for literally tens of miles before you'd see so much as a house. One could so very easily drive for hours around the countryside, and it was just so open and empty...it was incredibly helpful to me to put in some music and just go drive. I was suicidal when I lived in that little town, going through depression with more of the overwhelming sadness side of it, and I really believe that getting out and driving is one of the things that helped me get through it. It always sucked afterward or whenever my mind was idle and thoughts and soul crushing feelings came back, but for those couple hours, nothing else mattered.

A few years later, I find myself now living in a metropolitan area, and I really don't have the freedom that I had living in that rural community. Yeah, I can get out and drive, but I don't have that openness that living in the middle of nowhere offered. Constantly dealing with commuter traffic, highways, and also the fact that it would take an hour of driving in any direction to get to a rural area. I'm not saying that now I can't enjoy driving like I used to, but with how just tired I am....the thought of fighting traffic or going red light to red light just seems not worth the effort. I've tried emulating the experience I had in years past through free roam driving video games, and it helps, but I long for more.

I don't mean to come off as if I'm rejecting the notion, because I agree with you that it could be something that at least is a great help in dealing with this existence. I guess at this point I'm just needing to find another way I can get that same fix, so to speak.

Thank you for commenting and allowing me to share my own side of this sort of thing. It's helping a bit at least, just talking about it all.