This is my two cents:

You need to reevaluate what jiujitsu was to you (why you started), what you have achieved, what you still want to achieve, and whether those things are realistic.

You need to then think on it for a few days, and approach your coach to say hey, this is what I am, why I'm here, why I've been coming back so often. It feels wrong now, what's going on... Is this hazing? Is this how training is going to be now? I need your support (as my coach) to guide me through this.

Then after that you might have to walk away, or not... But fight for it first :)

My coach can be a bit like that sometimes. I kind of shrug it off because I always improve the most in the shortest amount of time by being crushed hard.

It does seem that there may have been two changes or potential changes... Which are you and getting your blue belt - and the rest of your club seeing you get your blue belt. These are quite different things in a way - both involve you getting your blue - but one is about you and how you perceive and what you expect - where the other side is - everyone else, how do they act to you being a blue? If they ignored you - then they don't care about you - but that's not what is happening. Everyone is giving you their best. It sounds to me like they are trying to mould you from being a pretty good grappler into a beast. But then again I could be totally wrong here. If that is what they are doing then maybe it could be settled with a conversation like "I'm older, I'm not that worried about winning comps, I just want to train for fun."

Or I could be completely wrong and I've just stopped in bat country.

Hope it turns out a way that you're happy :D