I feel old.

I feel this deeply. I was diagnosed 9 years ago. I have tried so hard to carve something of substance for me, but it only drained me more to the point I feel it damaged my soul. I feel like ive lost a lot of empathy il never regain. The ups and downs of intense feelings of suicidality, but still just waited and tried so hard. I feel so empty it feels physically painful. I am still only an observer in this life sitting in the corner. I cant break through the window I look from and Im starting to accept the rest of my life will feel like this. But im trying to stay positive and digging through this subreddit now to find maybe some good advise for some improvement of quality of life.

/r/depression Thread