You definitely aren't alone in feeling this way, but I wouldn't call it normal, simply for the fact that I think most people cope with it better than others. You've expressed that because you feel so bad about yourself, you're lashing out, so no that isn't normal (or maybe a better word would be not "healthy").

I've been where you are. What has helped me is leaning into it, rather than fighting it. The honest truth is that if you work on yourself, focus on developing skills and always doing your best, you do not have to be pretty. It honestly doesn't matter that someone you had a crush on also felt you were attractive, because if you focus on that, you're setting yourself up to constantly seek approval from other people to let you know you still have value, as a person.

Being pretty doesn't affect your worth. It doesn't affect your competence. I wish we taught young girls this, but the reality is that even people as close as family instill the idea that 'you are only worth as much as your appearance' from waaay too early in our lives.