A few years ago, I went MMO hopping trying to discover a game that had the same tight community that Ragnarok Online's Sakray server had around 2002-2005. I ended up deciding that due to the way the games are made, where there are no central areas and everybody follows a quest treadmill, the communities were kept too fluid and moving to allow anyone to put down roots.

I got to thinking recently, though. That this is how it's always been. It wasn't the games that changed, it was me. Before, I was willing to settle in and slow down, stop grinding to shoot the breeze with others, now and then. That is the difference. In my hunt for better communities, I was unwilling to join guilds and really commit to one because I'd probably be leaving it soon. I focused on the game aspect and how fast everybody moved. But it was the guilds that made the grindy games good, not the gameplay.

Either way, I am unwilling to commit to another game socially at that level. I am older now, and the thought of diving back in that deeply just feels exhausting anymore. Looking back on old friends lists, they are almost completely shaded grey. That can be depressing, thinking of the fun times, but I know the lists can always be rebuilt. Those times aren't "over", they just require more effort and commitment than I consider them to be worth.