Like the one person said, you never get over it. I chose to stay with WW b/c we have kids. In my line of work, I have talked to many current/former judges, lawyers, and correctional officers. All of which have told me how common it is for children to be molested by their mother's partners. (Side note: this is something she used to not believe me about before she made a career change and asked a couple former COs and lawyers if that really was common. They confirmed to her it is surprisingly common) How men will actively seek women with kids b/c they can easily manipulate the mothers to believe them and not the children. Unfortunate for me, I was about to kick their mother to the curb, when she started talking about how much she loves the kids how she can't live without them. Before this, she would say the exact opposite. She couldn't stand the kids. By the time I gathered the courage to tell her, after the old college try of working it out (we weren't married yet), she flipped her script about the kids. Her family is has some connections, so I couldn't realistically afford a good enough lawyer to fight for my kids compared to what I know her family could get her. So I made the choice to stay for my kids. It's fucking hard as hell. I definitely don't look at my now wife the same. I took some of my emotions out on my family/ friends before I learned how to control myself again. Sometimes I slip up and show my WW that I don't care as much as I used to, but I can bring it back. I just look at my kids and remember what those people told me. How common it is for terribly unspeakable things to happen to kids b/c their of their mothers (I know it's not all mothers, just speaking from my experience). So yeah, you never get over it. There are days/moments where I forget what happened, but then I will get a reminder of her infidelity. Then I will look at my kids and remind myself that I'm doing this for them. I know: once a cheater, always a cheater. So that kind of helps in a wierd way. I really don't care if she does again. If she does, it's ok. It won't hurt me anymore, I just hope she accidentally leaves some evidence.