For those that tried to work things out after infidelity, did your relationship improve? Did you eventually leave or as the saying goes “once a cheater always a cheater”?

I've been on both sides of this. I think it comes down to the person and the couple. Unfortunately it takes work from both people.

I had an emotional affair with an ex, nothing physical or sexual, and my guy at the time of course found out. I tried, what I thought, was very hard to get it back right again. Realized I messed up bad and what caused it, where I faulted and how stupid I was, especially for falling into it with my ex who had always cheated on me in the past and was doing the same to his current girl. So stupid, still mad at myself for all of it and for hurting my guy so badly.

My guy at the time tried to work with me, but he became very harsh and in some ways quite abusive towards me eventually. It was a long year or so of being treated very badly as revenge or punishment for what I did. He even ended up cheating on me sexually while I was crying my eyes out almost daily trying to fix it. I wont go into further detail, but it was bad what I went through and would never do it again.

Of course, i totally understood his rage and anger and what I had broken and it being my fault. Im still very remorseful and think about it all frequently, wishing I could undo it. It got to a point where I told myself I had paid enough punishment and trying to save a relationship, even from my own wrong doings, is not worth putting myself thru the severe mistreatment and chaotic mental battles and everything else. I've forgiven him for everything and I don't know if he has ever truly forgiven me. We got to a point where we were civil friends and then he dropped off. I still hang on the loss and still miss him, but not romantically. I just wish I could take it back.

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