We're friends at this point because she's fun to be around. The meaningful friendship we've had since we were young gradually deteriorated as she became less and less responsible. Of course I still care about her, but if I'm being honest, she's not the kind of person I hang around most of the time, I'm friends with her out of nostalgia and because we have a few common interests.

As for the help, I specifically said I'd help her only if she wants me to. If she's not actually lazy and taking advantage of her parents and it's an illness, I'd be far more sympathetic overall, and I'd probably want to help her be more independent, like help her get her license, maybe job hunt together, get her active, or just be generally supportive in ways friends can be. If I saw genuine improvement I'd even risk getting her a job at my workplace. As it is, I don't even trust her to show up on time, and that would make me look bad.

And you ask why she would do it. Because she gets to live with her parents rent free, with no responsibilities, and make them look cruel if they make her leave. She's lazy, and has been for almost as long as I've known her. But she's not lazy enough to have fun, to go to the beach, to go to parties, to stay over student people's houses until 4am talking about Harry Potter, to play scrabble, etc etc. But she's content not going to school or having a job for 6 years, 5.8 of which she never mentioned being depressed, suicidal, bipolar, manic or feeling like she might have any sort of mental illness. She was blue on occasion, sure, like any normal person.

Honestly, I don't understand why the default is to believe her. If she's faking it, wouldn't people who actually have bipolar disorder actually be mad that she's trivializing what they live through?