Not fiction. I have as much of a relationship with her as I have had with any "girlfriend" although now I have much more control.
What preceded the divorce left me a hollow empty non-person. I spent several months alone trying to create a new person to exist in the shell that was left.
I am no longer devastated by the divorce. It is simply a thing I have to deal with. And I do so in the ways that benefit me the most. Often this means doing things that benefit my children as the emotional connection I have with them causes this to be a benefit to me.
The new person does not care about morality at all. I am morally fluid now. I simply make cost/benefit analysis and choose to do what is best for me. At all times. Often what is best for me is good for other people. Often it is bad for them. I do not take this into account in my analysis as it no longer matters to me. Her fiance will undoubtedly be hurt, quite badly, by her actions. Perhaps he will seek to express his hurt through harming me. I take action to ensure that any harm he tries to do to me can be mitigated. I am well aware of what the laws of our society (as much as I disagree with them) are and how I can use them in my favor.
The entire post is true. I have no idea how fucked up the fiance is. It does not matter to me except to gauge how this may affect my life. The plate is definitely fucked up. As are every single person I get to know. I know which buttons I can push to effect her emotions and I experiment in new ways to do so. I do this to everyone now.
We view responsibility in vastly different ways. Perhaps should I cuckold him into raising my child I will have different emotions to manage, should that happen, and I will have to find new ways to manage them. But I am basically only concerned with my emotions.
My children that I already have I do have a strong emotional bond with. I do make sure that they have amazing lives. I enjoy being a visitor/parent in their lives and I enjoy making them happy and successful.
I mostly view people as objects for me to manipulate in some way for my own gain. I probably am a psychopath at this point. I find that this helps my life as my life has been quite a bit more successful since I have become this new person. In fact I can not even really understand who I used to be. The memories I have are foreign to me and I dislike that they are in my head.
I am aware that there are all kinds of women I can have various degrees of relationships with and I no longer care about these illusionary constraints other people want to place on me. I do care about their opinion of me and I take steps to alter it in the ways that benefit me.
I am far more manipulative then you know. One day perhaps I will make a field report of the many ways, that you would undoubtedly think are "immoral", as if that word even means anything, and post it here. I have found many of these things to be quite beneficial in getting people to do what I want them to do.
Society is not going to reward me for being "moral" in the way you want me to be. I will act in the ways that benefit me and me alone. Quite often these actions benefit other people. Sometimes it massively benefits them. This is not the point, though, unless I am trying to manipulate them in some way.
My old boss at work? I intentionally got him fired. Now I have his job. We are friends and I sometimes visit him and his wife and children. I don't hate him. I'm not sure I really like him either. I just wanted his job and he was in the way. Objectively speaking I am a far better boss then he is. It is important for me to excel at my position so that I can get more money to enhance the quality of my life.
I was much happier as the other person that I sometimes remember. I was also much sadder. But my life is more successful being the person I am now. I could choose to follow what you believe is moral but if I were to do that I would be constantly aware that I was not being as successful as I could. I do not know of any way to go back to being the old person that I once was.
It's like going back into the matrix. I don't think there is any way for me to do it. And I am well aware that society, in general, would probably benefit more (ie more utility being created for everyone) should I follow what you believe is moral. This simply no longer matters to me. I will pretend like it matters, though, when it benefits me.